Woman emotionally blackmailed by mother to not report stepfather's abuse, court hears
By Sonya McLean and Eimear Dodd
A young woman has said that she was emotionally blackmailed by her mother not to report to the gardaí that her stepfather had sexually abused her as a child.
The 44-year-old man had been sexually abusing the girl from the age of 13 in the family home while her mother was out working. The abuse included oral rape and attempted rape.
“I still can’t understand how my mother took the side of a paedophile,” the woman said in her victim impact statement.
The Central Criminal Court heard that after disclosing the abuse to her mother, the then-teenager was told by her mother to think of her family and not to report the abuse. Her mother told her that her stepfather had attended his local church and had asked for forgiveness.
The man, who cannot be named to protect the identity of the woman, pleaded guilty to eight charges including oral rape, attempted rape and sexual assault on dates between January 2015 and December 2017.
Dean Kelly SC, prosecuting, said the Director of Public Prosecutions accepted the pleas on the basis that full facts in the case be heard.
The teenager was between 13 and 16 years old at the time of the abuse. The girl had been living with her grandmother outside of Ireland until she was 11 years old, when her mother moved her to Ireland to live with her, her stepfather and younger siblings.
On Thursday, the man was sentenced to nine years with the final year suspended.
In her victim impact statement, the woman said that she had been taken away from her grandmother as a young child.
She described herself as “vulnerable and innocent” and said she was “assaulted and preyed upon” and said that, following the first incident of abuse, she asked herself if this was normal behaviour for a stepfather.
She described his behaviour as calculated as he always waited until her mother was at work.
She said it took her five years to get the courage to speak out – five years to realise it was not normal.
“I still can’t understand how my mother took the side of a paedophile,” she said.
Her mother asked her, “Don’t you want a happy family?” and asked her to think of her younger siblings. She said she was emotionally blackmailed to prevent her from going to the gardaí.
She said she has tried therapy, but it has not really worked out for her. She suffers from low self-esteem and feels alone.
Testimonials were handed into court by James McGowan SC, defending, describing the man as a hard worker.
Character references were also handed into court in the form of affidavits from the accused’s church. He was described as a loving father with kindness and deep love for others and a man who is always supportive of the church’s charitable donations.
The affidavit stated that the church was aware of the serious offending, but it firmly believes that this behaviour is not representative of his true character, and it believes he has learned his lesson.
A character reference from a close friend said the man had been very kind to their family and said the accused had made a terrible mistake.
Justice Paul McDermott said the woman had “set out eloquently the consequences of the abuse” in her victim impact statement.
He noted “the different path she had taken with great courage to address her stepfather’s appalling behaviour,” acknowledging that she “faced a large degree of maternal and family isolation pursuing the matter”.
Justice McDermott said the victim was put under pressure by her family to keep the abuse a secret, and she was made to feel like she was the problem.
He said the victim had demonstrated “great fortitude” and “forged a life for herself”.
“Her achievements are considerable,” Justice McDermott said, wishing her that these achievements will continue for her in the future.
“It should not be underestimated the difficulties she faced embarking on that path in life at the same time as dealing with these offences,” Justice McDermott said.
The judge noted that the victim’s mother and stepfather joined a church in 2019, and the members of that church are aware of his offending and have “absolved him”.
The judge noted the contents of the probation report, which assesses the man at moderate risk of re-offending unless he addresses risk factors and found that he minimised his offending behaviour.
Justice McDermott said the offences represented a breach of trust and that it was an aggravating feature that the then child was in a vulnerable position, having just been brought to Ireland to a new home where she should have been provided with security and protection.
He said a headline sentence of 12 years was appropriate before he took into account mitigating features, including his guilty plea and admissions in the interview. He also took into account the man’s good work history and willingness to work with The Probation Service.
Justice McDermott imposed a sentence of nine years and suspended the final year of that term on strict conditions for two years.
He said the man should comply with child protection arrangements and not be in the company of children unsupervised. He also said he is not to have any contact with the victim, either directly or indirectly, without her express consent. A five-year post-release supervision order was also imposed.
If you have been affected by any of the issues raised in this article, you can call the national 24-hour Rape Crisis Helpline at 1800-77 8888, access text service and webchat options at drcc.ie/services/helpline/ or visit Rape Crisis Help.
